African Proverbs About Love and Relationships: Timeless Wisdom

African proverbs offer deep insight into the ancient culture and traditions of the land while at the same time providing wisdom on life and truth based on common sense or experience. Many wise African sayings - while short and simple - hold deep messages and hidden meanings to teach, inspire, warn, and entertain.

These traditional African words of wisdom cover a wide range of themes, dealing with thought-provoking topics that include family, marriage, relationships, life, death, hope, love, and everything in-between. You will even find a list of funny African proverbs and wise sayings from Africa that poke fun at some serious issues.

Here are a few wonderful African proverbs that should get you thinking. Some are straightforward. And some are not.

Let's delve into some great African sayings and words of wisdom, specifically focusing on love and relationships.

To all the romantics out there (including myself), here are five proverbs that give a reality check on relationships.

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Proverbs About Love

Here are some ancient African proverbs about love, beauty, faith, and hope.

• "Where there is love, there is no darkness."
• "Love, like rain, does not choose the grass on which it falls."
• "If the full moon loves you, why worry about the stars?"
• "It is better to be loved than to be feared."
• "When one is in love, a cliff becomes a meadow."
• "Let your love be like the misty rain, coming softly but flooding the river."
• "You know who you love but you can’t know who loves you."
• "He may say that he loves you, wait and see what he does for you."
• "Every kind of love is love, but self-love is supreme among them."
• "Brothers love each other when they are equally rich."
• "Love is a painkiller."
• "He who loves, loves you with your dirt."
• "One who marries for love alone will have bad days but good nights."
• "Love for something makes a man blind and deaf."
• "Truth should be in love and love in truth."
• “True love means what’s mine is yours.”
• "Love doesn’t listen to rumors."
• "If love is a sickness, patience is the remedy."
• "The quarrel of lovers is the renewal of love."
• "It is difficult for two long-nosed lovers to kiss."
• "Love doesn’t rely on physical features."
• "When one is in love, a mountain top becomes a flat field."
• "When you marry a monkey for his wealth, the money goes but the monkey remains."
• "A happy man marries the girl he loves; a happier man loves the girl he married."
• "Don’t try to make someone hate the person he loves. For he will go on loving but he will hate you."
• "If anyone makes you laugh, it is not always because they love you."
• "One who loves the vase, loves also what is inside."
• "To love someone who doesn’t love you is like shaking a tree to make the dew drops fall."
• "Lovers do not hide their nakedness."
• "Love is a despot who spares no one."
• "If a woman doesn’t love you, she calls you “brother.”
• "Do not treat your loved one like a swinging door: you are fond of it but you push it back and forth."
• "Don’t be so in love that you can’t tell when it’s raining."
• Love has to be shown by deeds not words.
• “Examine what is said, not who is speaking.”
• “Truth should be in love and love in truth.”
• “Even as the archer loves the arrow that flies, so too he loves the bow that remains constant in his hands.”
• “A happy man marries the girl he loves; a happier man loves the girl he married.”
• Marriage is like a groundnut - you have to crack them to see what is inside.
• “It’s better to fall from a tree and break your back than to fall in love and break your heart.”

Coffee and love taste best when hot! Who said African men are not passionate. Ethiopia is famous for its coffee, so the next time you sip a steaming cup of coffee think about heating up your love life too.

Here are a few more funny love quotes for your enjoyment.

• "Do not desire a woman with beautiful breasts, if you have no money."
• "If you are ugly you must either learn to dance or make love."
• "To love the king is not bad, but a king who loves you is better."
• "If you marry a monkey for his wealth, the money goes and the monkey remains as is."
• "Never marry a woman who has bigger feet than you."
• "He who does not like chattering women must remain a bachelor."
• "Pretend you are dead and you will see who really loves you."
• "The buttocks are like a married couple though there is constant friction between them; they will still love and live together."
• "It is Mr. Old-Man-Monkey who marries Mrs. Old-Woman-Monkey."
• "If there were no cold Friday evenings and boring Saturdays, no one would get married any more."
• "If money were to be found up in the trees, most people would be married to monkeys."
• "If a young woman says no to marriage just wait until her breasts sag."

Marriage is like a groundnut; you have to crack it to see what is inside. Ah marriage that bed of roses that is so often talked about. How can one speak of love without speaking of marriage.

Here are African quotes about marriage:

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• One who marries for love alone will have bad days but good nights.
• A home without a woman is like a barn without cattle.
• A happy man marries the girl he loves, but a happier man loves the girl he marries.
• Marriage is like a groundnut; you have to crack it to see what is inside.
• If you have no relatives, get married.
• A man without a wife is like a vase without flowers.
• A young wife tends to cook too much at first.
• Bread without sauce and a home without a wife are meaningless.
• A bird can be guarded, a wife can’t.
• One who plants grapes by the road side, and one who marries a pretty woman, share the same problem.
• A good wife is easy to find, but good in-laws are rare.
• It is better to be married to an old lady than to remain unmarried.
• The man may be the head of the home but the wife is the heart.
• Marriage is not a tight knot, but a slip knot.
• The woman who does not covet the possessions of her husband is in love with another man.

Here are a few African proverbs that should get you thinking. Some are straightforward. And some are not.

• Don’t try to make someone hate the person he loves.
• Do not treat your loved one like a swinging door: you are fond of it but you push it back and forth.

Many women including myself like to claim that the male segment of our population knows nothing about love and romance. African men in particular get a lot of criticism for been un-romantic and incapable of expressing their emotions. From personal experience I would say that this is not true, some of the most romantic men I have dated are African.

However, what is romance really? I like to define it as the expression of love. In this article I define romance through the use of some of my favorite African love quotes. These African quotes give us a glimpse into African culture and views on life. They are a part of African history and show us that love and the expression of love are universal.

The best part of happiness lies in the secret heart of a lover.

• Where there is love there is no darkness.
• A woman is a flower in a garden; her husband is the fence around it.
• A letter from the heart can be read on the face.
• Love is like a baby: it needs to be treated tenderly.
• Let your love be like the misty rain, coming softly, but flooding the river.
• Love is like rice: transplanted, still it grows.
• If the full moon loves you, why worry about the stars?
• Many little things make a man love a woman in a big way.
• One thread for the needle, one love for the heart.
• The house of a person we love is never far.
• He who loves the vase loves also what is inside.
• The one who loves an unsightly person is the one who makes her beautiful.
• He who loves, loves you with your dirt.
• Love never gets lost it is only kept.
• Happiness requires something to do, something to love and something to hope for.

Chinua Achebe (1930-2013), one of Africa’s and Nigeria’s most celebrated sons said it best, “Proverbs are the palm oil with which words are eaten.” Referring specifically to Igbo culture, and indeed in many Nigerian cultures, palm oil is used to make the meal sweeter. In the same way, our conversations are enriched by the proverbs we use.

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Let's forget about romance for a moment.

I have been collecting African proverbs for a few years now. I love the mix of rich metaphors, wisdom, wit and refreshing bluntness that they offer. Whilst they are specific to African culture, everyone can gain some interesting life insights from them.

A fish and a bird may fall in love but the two cannot build a home together.

So, I suppose it’s nice to have a spark, tingly warm feeling and goosebumps when you are with your partner (however long that lasts), but I don’t know what use that is if you are constantly arguing about everyday choices and core values.

There are examples of relationships where one person can have kids, wants kids and considers this vital, but the other is totally uninterested. Given that this is such an important decision, the couple would really have to ponder about their future together.

Let me explain the love story between the fish and bird and how it all came to a bitter end.

It’s much easier to fall in love than to stay in love. A friend once told me that the longest relationship he had ever had lasted for 6 months and that love was overrated. I was a bit taken aback. My present relationship is beyond 3 years and we still love each other like when we started.

Am not writing to debate the existence of love. Some say it doesn't exist, others say it does. Staying in love demands a conscious effort. I have had a few rough edges with my partner. Some times we argue, disagree or just want to be alone for a while,, but the end we always make peace. It's not a fairy tale love story.

I need to constantly remind myself why I fell in love in the first place. Do you think you have a future together?, You ask. My answer is, God has given us today as a gift. Am christian, and forgive me if your not of the same faith. But I'll just share this passage that makes a lot of meaning to me.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.

Proverbs have inspired me for a long time. There is so much wisdom in them. My father always told me a few every now and then. What are your thoughts on this proverb? What do you think it means?

You always learn a lot more when you lose than when you win.

A man who takes away another man’s freedom is a prisoner of hatred.

We will water the thorn for the sake of the rose.

When a needle falls into a deep well, many people will look into the well, but few will be ready to go down after it.

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