How to Write an Obituary: A Comprehensive Guide

Dec 02, 2025 0

Creating an obituary is a thoughtful way to honor a loved one’s life and legacy. This guide will help you write a respectful and meaningful obituary that provides essential information while celebrating their life. Whether you’re writing it yourself or assisting a friend, following these steps can make the process simpler and more heartfelt.

Understanding the Purpose of an Obituary

An obituary serves as more than just a death announcement. It’s an opportunity to share details about the deceased’s life, achievements, and impact on their family and community. It should also provide essential information about funeral arrangements and memorial services. Obituaries are approximately 200 words.

Key Elements to Include in an Obituary

Carefully read all the material, then determine what is the most important to include.

1. Essential Factual Details

The first section of an obituary should include key factual details:

Deceased’s full name, including well-known nickname, (if any) followed by a comma and age at death.
Residence (name of the city) at death.
Date and place of death (if appropriate).

Example: “John Henry Smith, 74, of Amarillo, Texas, passed away peacefully on October 20, 2024, at BSA Hospital.

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2. Life Summary

This section is where the deceased’s story comes to life. Highlight milestones, achievements, and the qualities that defined them.

Highlight milestones, achievements, and the qualities that defined them.
Legacy: Highlight their contributions to family, friends, and the community.
Employment: jobs, activities, promotions, union activities. Frequently used if the person held long-term employment with a company; or had a particular passion for his or her profession.

Example: “Born in Amarillo, Texas, on May 3, 1950, John graduated from Lamar University with a degree in Business Administration. He spent over 40 years as a respected banker and was known for his dedication to clients and community.

Mentioning your loved one’s significant life events is a way to pay tribute to their memory.

3. Family Acknowledgement

Including the names of surviving family members honors their relationships with the deceased.

Siblings: Include siblings and other close family members.
The next section of the obituary acknowledges the surviving family members and loved ones.

Example: “John was preceded in death by his wife, Mary.

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4. Personal Touches

Use this section to share what made the deceased unique. Highlight their personality, values, and favorite sayings or habits.

Example: “John will be remembered for his kindness, unwavering integrity, and love for his family.

Instead of using generic adjectives to describe their character and life’s achievements, take a moment to reflect on who they were and use these details to enhance your content.

You can take a moment to reflect on these answers yourself or pose these questions to other family members and friends to get their insights.

5. Funeral or Memorial Details

Provide specifics about services, including location, date, and time.

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Finally, list the time, date and address of your loved one’s funeral or memorial service.
You can also list any special requests for the service at the end.

6. Additional Information

Families often suggest donations to a charity in lieu of flowers.
If you plan to include a photo, choose a high-quality headshot of your loved one. It can be a past or recent picture - as long as they would be content with your choice.

By including essential details and personal touches, you can create a tribute that celebrates their story and shares their impact with others. Personalize It: Include unique details that truly capture the essence of the deceased.

Tips for Writing a Great Obituary

You now know how to write a good obituary - but how can you make it great?

As the purpose of an obituary is to inform others of your loved one’s passing, you should begin with this information.
Families may choose to mention the reason behind their loved one’s death. For example, they may refer to the person’s brave battle against cancer or provide details of a tragic event.

Sometimes, a quote or prayer encapsulates your grief in ways you can’t express at the time.

Dos and Don'ts

You may feel pressured to include a funny story or inject humor into a sad situation when writing an obituary for your loved one. Some people are reserved and private. In these cases, humor may seem unnatural at their funeral.
Another factor you will have to contend with is the word count. As obituaries are roughly 200 words, there’s not a lot of space to hash out all the details of a humorous story and do it justice.
A way around this is to save the humor for your eulogy.

Examples of Well-Written Obituary Excerpts

An excellent example of this is the New York Times obituary written for legendary comedian and actor Robin Williams written by Dave Itzkoff.

1. Highlighting Comedy Style and Talents

Mr. Williams, as a boy, hardly fit the stereotype of someone who would grow to become a brainy comedian, or a goofy one, but he was both. Onstage he was known for ricochet riffs on politics, social issues and cultural matters both high and low; tales of drug and alcohol abuse; lewd commentaries on relations between the sexes; and lightning-like improvisations on anything an audience member might toss at him. His gigs were always rife with frenetic, spot-on impersonations that included Hollywood stars, presidents, princes, prime ministers, popes and anonymous citizens of the world. His irreverence was legendary and uncurtailable.

This first excerpt does a good job of explaining what Mr. Williams was best known for, his comedy. The excerpt outlines the style of comedy he was best known for while highlighting the talents he had to perform improv and impressions on the spot. It paints a picture of the comedic genius that Robin Williams was.

2. Highlighting Career Successes

He went on to earn Academy Award nominations for his roles in films like “Good Morning, Vietnam,” in which he played a loquacious radio D.J.; “Dead Poets Society,” playing a mentor to students in need of inspiration; and “The Fisher King,” as a homeless man whose life has been struck by tragedy. He won an Oscar in 1998 for “Good Will Hunting,” playing a therapist who works with a troubled prodigy played by Matt Damon.

This section is a great example of how to highlight successes the individual had during their career. While many people were fans of Mr. Williams for his comedy, he was also an accomplished actor being nominated and winning several awards throughout his career. This shows how there was much more to Mr. Williams than just comedy. He was a talented dramatic actor and had a range of skills that were often under appreciated.

3. Including Quotes About Impact on Others

In a statement, President Obama said of Mr. Williams, “He gave his immeasurable talent freely and generously to those who needed it most - from our troops stationed abroad to the marginalized on our own streets.”

It is always a great idea to include a quote or some kind words about the impact the individual had on others. In this case, a quote from President Obama is used to show the charitable side of Mr. Williams and how he enjoyed helping others and giving back.

4. Referencing Family

He is survived by a son, Zak, from his marriage to Valerie Velardi, and a daughter, Zelda, and a son, Cody, from his marriage to Marsha Garces.

An important part to include within an obituary is a reference to the deceased’s family. In this case, Mr. Williams had preceded his immediate family in death so it lists who he is survived by.

Simple Obituary Template

The below example is fairly simple and short. You can use this as a sort of template where you add in the information applicable to your loved one and your situation. For the most part we have colored in red where to add in your specific information. Hopefully, this gives you a framework if you are looking for a simple obituary that still captures the essence of your loved one.

[Full Name], aged [age of the deceased], passed away peacefully on [date of death], at [location of death]. He/she was born on [date of birth], in [birthplace], to [names of parents]. He/she was a proud resident of [city of residence] and was a 1975 graduate of Holy Cross High School. He/she married [name of spouse] on [date of marriage], in [location of marriage]. He/she worked as a financial consultant with Truesdell Managemet, displaying wonderful problem solving skills. [First Name] was very outgoing and loved exploring and going on adventures. His/her family and travel were his/her two biggest passions. [First Name] always had the ability to make anyone smile. He/she is survived by her wife/husband, [spouse’s first name]; an older brother, [brother’s name] (name of brother’s spouse) Robertson; and many nieces, nephews, and cousins. Family, friends, and others are invited to the [Funeral Home name],[Funeral Home address/location], from [time of ceremony] on [date of ceremony], to reminisce and honor the life of [deceased’s first name].

Additional Tips and Considerations

Keep it short and publish it locally. National media outlets charge much more than local ones, plus you’ll likely reach more people who care if you stick close to home.
Achievement is boring, so keep the focus on the details that truly capture a personality.
Embrace the contradictions.
That said, don’t use an obituary to express your anger and grudges. Find a therapist for that.
Welcome other people’s contributions. Before you send it off, show your obit to family members and friends who knew your loved one well.
A tribute is for the bereaved, and it’s not about your fabulous writing.

Writing an obituary is a meaningful way to honor a loved one’s life and legacy. By including essential details and personal touches, you can create a tribute that celebrates their story and shares their impact with others.